Friday, April 4, 2014

Stop Teaching Your Kids to be Dicks

No quilts today. I've finished a few things and I'll share them tomorrow or Sunday, but for now I need to cover an incredibly important topic: bullying.

Parents, you are leading your children down paths to being a dick.

Not all of you. Some of you are fucking awesome parents, you know who you are. Your kids are forming interests on their own, they're coming into themselves, they're bright, they're funny, they're kind hearted and loving and caring.

For the rest of you, your children are dicks, straight up horrible 8 (or whatever) year old douche bags.

I was bullied as a child. What did I do wrong?

When I was 9 I donated $100 (my entire life savings) to Hersey Children's Hospital because a friend had recently passed away from cancer (he was also 9).
I volunteered regularly, doing things for my community and people I didn't know.
I played video games.
I had the best Pokemon deck, and I actually knew how to play.
I would have watched Sailor Moon (and other anime) until my eyes bled if my mom let me.
I had (have) huge, frizzy, uncontrollable hair.
I was (and am) sensitive.
I took anyone and everyone under my wing.
I got really good grades.
I started college while I was still in high school, I was one of two people picked by the college for the program.
I acted in school plays.
I played soccer, pretty well too.
I was a cheerleader.
I was a caring child and I believed so strongly that everyone was inherently good.
I was bullied, to the point of tears, every day of my life until the day I graduated high school.

When I was 9 my nick name was frizz head. When I was 12 someone spread a rumor that I had a penis, that rumor stuck until senior year, most people thought it was a harmless joke in high school but it really did hurt my feelings. For the record, I have always had a vagina. When I was 14 someone spread a rumor that I had sex with a ton of guys, even though I hadn't even had my first kiss at that age and yes, I was most definitely a virgin. I was called every name in the book. I spent a lot of my time in the guidance counselors office because that was the only safe place I could escape the bullying, and teachers just stood idly by. It seemed to never end, until the summer after senior year when I finally was freed from the torment. School up until college was a living hell for me.

Now one of the most incredible, loving, kind hearted, brilliant, super funny, and amazing kids I know is going through some of the same stuff I went through as a kid, and no one, other than his parents, is doing a damn thing about it.

When will we as a society wake the fuck up?

Lead by example. Your children learn from you. They watch you, they listen to everything you say, they see everything you do.

Stop being a dick, and your kids will stop being dicks.

Be kind. Share your love with others. Radiate positivity, it won't just make others feel good, it will make you feel good, too.

Now go do something nice for someone!


  1. :) Tis' true. I hope people are listening!

  2. Hi
    I'm here for the first time (through BAQ website), but wanted to comment on this post, because:
    my now 18yrs old youngest son made the same experience as you did and as this poor child does now. He had to go through it for aprox 3 yrs before he told us about it (he did not want to "burden" us. We immediately took steps, when I heard about it.
    He went to a therapy in order to become more selfconfident. He did not change the school, because this is not always the best solution.
    He changed classes (went into the 7th instead of 8th - I hope you understand my poor English).
    Now he is happy: has loads of friends, is selfconfident and will end school next year and go on to university.
    I truly believe, that children today are too much grown up with the following sentence: "Just look at yourself - the others don't matter. Do whatever is necessary to achieve your goal - even if you hurt anybody else. Hold your elbows high"
    The friendlier / kinder a child is, also caring for others and respecting them, the sooner it will be bullied. What do children learn nowadays? Life is all about being successful - who has the most, the best, the highest, the greatest ;)
    I never wanted to teach my children that way and did not do it. Sometimes it seams as if we have to teach our children to be "little assholes" in order to not be bullied - it's like the stronger ones want to have a victim.

    I wish that this child will manage the situation as our son did. He is happy now, although a few yrs ago he did not want to live anymore.
    The only thing which helps is being selfconfident and also talking to the teachers again and again- because the parents of those "monsters" don't care.

    I hope it was ok to write that here.... after reading your post, I had to ;)

    Greetings from Germany,


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